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Emo-Gee Whiz

It’s time to start a new language revolution.

Photo+by+Chrystian+Noble
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Emo-Gee Whiz

Photo by Chrystian Noble

Photo by Chrystian Noble

Photo by Chrystian Noble

Photo by Chrystian Noble

Paige Twenter

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The English language truly is beautiful. With only 26 characters, we can form 171,476 different words (according to the Second Edition of the Oxford English Dictionary) to add meaning and purpose to our lives. In our digital age, something truly amazing has happened: the invention of emojis.

You might know them as “emoticons,” if you’re in one of the older generations that doesn’t know how to get to their photos without going to the camera app. Emojis 🙄 have caused an upheaval in the way we communicate. Now, rather than yelling at me, my mom just sends me one of the most poopular emojis:💩 I doubt the Egyptians had a hieroglyph for that. Soon, spoken and written language will become obsolete and humans will communicate purely through emojis.

All of those awkward conversations you never knew how to have? With emojis, never again will you be tongue twisted. Is it your doctor’s birthday? Send them the classic 🎂 👩🏽‍⚕️. Don’t know how to let someone down easily? Tell them straight up: I’ll date you ⏰🐷✈️. When emojis entered the digital world, I felt like a 🦌 in 👨💡💡 . But once I got comfortable with emoji lingo, communicating is as easy as 🔫🐠🛢️.

Every day, I can always rely on one thing: my dad to make a cringe-worthy dad joke and refer to himself as “dad joke king” in my family group chat with 👨🤡👑. Don’t ask me why he refers to himself as this, I don’t really know.

Have you found yourself about to hit send on a text that might seem a little harsh? No worries! Just slap on the crying laughing face emoji and instantly your words are a harmless joke.

Sure, the English language has been in existence for centuries, and spoken language since, well, around 200,000 years ago, but, who needs it? It’s so old-fashioned. Get ready world, the emojis are taking over.

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Emo-Gee Whiz